Do artists have to be miserable to produce great art?

Napoleon:

“Take courage, be ahead of your age, enlarge your imaginations, see far into the distance, and you will realize that the great men whom you believe to be violent, cruel, and what not are merely politic.”

“Remember that a man, a true man, never hates.”

“All the various workings of his mind were instantaneously depicted in his countenance; and his glance changed from mild to severe, and from angry to good-humoured, almost with the rapidity of lightning. It may truly be said that he had a particular look for every thought that arose in his mind.”

This seems to be characteristic of genius.

“‘a most gracious smile illuminated his countenance when he was cheered by good humour, or by the wish to be agreeable’....Madame de Rémusat praises his smile and Molé said ‘he never saw a smile more amiable, or at least more distinguished, more refined, than that of Napoleon and that of Chateaubriand. But neither the one nor the other smiled every day.’”

This special smile is characteristic not only of Napoleon and Chateaubriand but of genius in general.

The combination of intellect and character is important not only in military matters, but in many other areas of life, too.

http://www.ljhammond.com/notebook/nap.htm

• Fred Charles Iklé, in The Role of Character and Intellect in Strategy:

  To do good work on national strategy almost demands a rotund intellect, a well-rounded personality. He whose vocation it is to work on these issues of war and peace cannot suffer from intellectual poverty. His soul must be in harmony with this world of ours. He must not only appreciate different cultures and good art, but also find nourishment in things that are beautiful and be endowed with a sense of humor. He might have, perhaps, an eye for architecture or painting, an ear for the best music; he must have a broad understanding of philosophy, literature, and, of course, history.

Kill-or-be-killed Mentality

Designer Karl Lagerfeld has launched into a bitter battle with animal rights activists after defending the use of fur in fashion.

The 75-year-old German boss of fashion house Chanel claims anti-fur protesters are "childish" and argues hunted animals would kill their human predators if they could.

Lagerfeld says, "In a meat eating world, wearing leather for shoes and even clothes, the discussion of fur is childish.

"(In the north, hunters) make a living having learned nothing else than hunting, killing those beasts who would kill us if they could kill us."

Michael McGraw, spokesperson for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA), has hit back, telling the New York Post,, "Lagerfeld seems particularly delusional with his kill-or-be-killed mentality. When was the last time a person's life was threatened by a mink or rabbit?"

It's not the first time Lagerfeld has battled PETA; in 2001 activists in New York hurled tofu pies at him at an event to protest his use of fur - but they missed, hitting fellow designer Calvin Klein instead.

source imdb

The Sense of Wonder

Rachel Carson, in her book The Sense of Wonder, writes, "Those who contemplate the beauty of the earth find reserves of strength that will endure as long as life lasts."

s: williamneill.photoshelter.com

Boredom in Marriage

As we thought about boredom in marriage, we remembered a book written by William Doherty in 2003, Take Back Your Marriage:; Sticking Together in a World That Pulls Us Apart.; It tackles the issue of boredom.; He wrote on page 23 that “... stakes are high. We must name these forces that undermine marriage, from the small forces such as boredom to the big ones such as the throwaway consumer culture..." We won’t comment on the throwaway consumer culture – we all agree that excessive materialism distracts people and can erode basic family values.;; Doherty mentions boredom as one of those “small forces” that can affect a marriage.; To us, however, it is NOT a small force.;
Boredom in marriage is like a hairline crack on the wall until time and inaction transform it into an irreparable major fault zone.; Once the crack is too big, both husband and wife have already gone deeper into the abyss, unable to extricate themselves from a helpless situation.

Boredom in Marriage:; Possible Causes

What causes boredom in marriage?; Is it just the lack of exciting sex or does aging have something to do with it?; For some couples, it could just be sex – a common complaint no doubt.; For other couples, it may be the lack of intellectual stimulation or what others call intellectual incompatibility.; We have heard some people say that by the time they reach retirement age, they have already shared and lived beautiful moments.; It is up to them to continue those beautiful moments beyond retirement.; Easier said than done!
Unfortunately, however, not all couples can sustain beauty and excitement in their marriage.; When they retire, they fall into a boring pattern of eating, reading the paper, watching television, doing the groceries, visiting with the kids and grandchildren every once in awhile, and repeating that routine until they begin to question if there’s anything else to living.; This routine even becomes more tiresome when couples are financially strapped.; Insufficient resources can sometimes be a factor of boredom in marriage.

Let’s look at some of the possible causes of boredom in marriage:

• Not enough sex (or boring sex)
• Illness and disability
• Inability to age gracefully
• Lack of mutual interests
• Intellectual incompatibility
• Absence of humor
• Social isolation
• No community support
• Dependent adult children
• Insufficient financial resources

If you study these causes, three major categories are apparent:; (a) financial problems (presence of adult children in the home and insufficient financial resources), (b) personality differences (boring sex, aging, lack of mutual interests, incompatibility, absence of humor), (c) external factors (illness and disability, social isolation, no community support).

Boredom in Marriage Due to Financial Problems

We used to know colleagues who were nearing retirement but could not plan for it.; They said that they had to postpone retirement because “we’re still helping our middle aged children financially.; They are always short of cash and my husband and I have no choice but to help in whatever way we can.; Because a portion of our savings has to be shared, my husband and I can’t afford to travel so we can’t really enjoy our lifetime savings.; That has put a strain on our marriage.”;
The era of downsizing and the dire consequences of easy credit have put adult children into a cash crunch, forcing them to turn to their parents for financial assistance.; When a retiring couple postpones retirement because of financial issues, boredom can set in. You figure that after having slaved at a job for 40-45 years, you’re entitled to reap the fruits of your labor.; When your children are financially struggling, self-imposed deprivation can hurt, leading to resentment or boredom.; How do you add spice to the broth when there isn’t enough money to buy the spice?
Instead of traveling and discovering new worlds, husband and wife have to content themselves with local trips; in some instances, even local trips are unaffordable.; Or else, instead of investing in a new sport or hobby, husband and wife have to tighten the purse strings so they can contribute towards the dental braces of their second grandchild.;
This lack of choices and lack of freedom generate boredom.; This also applies to married couples who are still many years away from retirement.; Children’s expenses such as tuition, camp, baby-sitters, extra-curricular activities and school trips eat into the family budget, preventing mother and father from enjoying the finer things in life.; If husband and wife mutually decide to postpone a trip to Europe, that means fewer opportunities for them to share meaningful experiences.

Boredom in Marriage Due to Personality Differences

It is common to hear husbands and wives complain about the lack of intellectual stimulation.; “We’ve grown apart”, one spouse says,;; “he’s into baseball and golf and can’t stop talking about them.; I don’t share any of his interests.; I think golf is utterly boring.”;
Or else you hear a husband say, “I can’t figure out why my wife won’t experiment with me in bed.; I tell her about how sex can add that much needed spark in our marriage but she refuses to try my suggestions.; I’m bored with the same routine and maybe it’s time for me to find a more willing and open-minded partner.”
Sex is a beautiful thing, and couples must make it a priority to make sex a dominant part of their married life.; It’s certainly healthy and can make husband and wife feel closer to one another.; There is absolutely nothing wrong with sharing one’s sexual fantasies – if they help rekindle the old flame, why not act out those fantasies?; Fantasies are a therapy for boredom, especially when these fantasies are shared by two intimate people.
While husband and wife should try to develop mutual interests, they can also leave each other some breathing room to pursue their respective interests and hobbies; this way they avoid “choking” each other by constant togetherness.; Couples need time apart so they can reflect on what makes them happy and on how they can preserve that marriage bliss.

Boredom in Marriage Due to External Factors

The lack of community support and social isolation also lead to boredom, especially when husband and wife do not have large families or when they leave their old neighborhood and relocate to a new city.; It takes time to cultivate friendships, but boredom in marriage can be avoided if couples make it a point to get involved in their community.; The recreational and leisure departments of most city governments have programs for couples, children and seniors.; Reaching out to others helps ward off boredom in marriage.
We remember the good times when our father was still alive.; Even if he was a busy executive, he made sure that he always gave back to the community.; He helped build a church while our mother played the organ in that church so that the choir can perform every Sunday.; At the dinner table, our parents would speak glowingly of their community – how it flourished because of the support it received from committed couples.


source: www.professorshouse.com

The Importance of Time Apart
Emotional Abuse
Falling out of Love

What is more important: comfort or pleasure?

A distinctive house provides comfort, which is not the same thing as pleasure. Comfort describes an abiding sense of enjoyment, warmth, contentment, and for some, a spiritual sense of well-being. Pleasure suggests entertainment, stimulation, and convenience.

Many production houses provide entertaining appliances, such as Jacuzzis, or rooms aimed at specific types of pleasures-for example, watching television, playing music, or dining. To me, one of the goals of a house should be not just to provide pleasure but to achieve a higher level of all-encompassing satisfaction. Well-propotioned spaces, good light, and small but thoughtful details can help push a home beyond more pleasure.

Pleasure is about entertainment, whereas comfort is all about enjoyment and warmth, which only a well-designed space or detail can give you

The distinctive home, by Jeremiah Eck.

What a women reads makes her more attractive and more elegant than what she wears

Roitfeld doesn't believe that it is the clothes that make the woman. "It's often the case that what a women reads makes her more attractive and more elegant than what she wears," she says.

You can't learn how to be elegant; you can only learn how to avoid mistakes. The rest is instinct. Elegance is about the way you cross your legs, not the label or the newest clothes from the latest collection.

Yves Saint Laurent once said that the purpose of clothes is to make women more beautiful but that a coat must never attract more attention than the woman wearing it.

S: Do you have any fashion principles?

R: I don't change my handbag every season. I believe in the Yves Saint Laurent woman who either has her hands in the pockets of her pantsuit or is holding her lover's hand. She doesn't need a bag.

S: You also always wear high heels.

R: Yes, they give you power. You move differently, sit differently and even speak differently.

SL: So you never wear flat-soled shoes? Not even when going for a walk?

R: I don't go for a walk very often. I wear flat-soled shoes on vacation, but I also travel in high heels, which is why I'm regularly stopped by customs officials at the airport. Wearing high heels in an airplane is suspicious. Nobody else does that.

S: Do you have any fashion tips for us?

R: If you don't want to make any mistakes, buy black clothes. That's always good. And from age 50 on, you can slowly start adding a little beige. That's softer. Every five years, you should take a critical look at your own wardrobe